As you know, last summer I played 40 roles in Becky Mode's one person show, FULLY COMMITTED, at Shadowland Theatre. I was terrified. But I faced the fear, jumped onstage and made it through the summer, relatively unscathed.
A few weeks ago I got a call from Brendan Burke, the artistic director or Shadowland, saying that there was a possibility of remounting the show in Binghamton, NY.
We went up there to meet the artistic director and I launched into a few of the lines, which surprisingly, I still remembered. But the the old fear crept in and I went up on my lines and stopped.
The director was interested and worked out a deal with Brendan so that we'll put the show up in June and July.
And now, I need to prepare for another battle. The show is a monster of memorization and I'm starting to work on each section now so that I am not gripped by such terror when I'm standing at the top of those stairs waiting to enter.
I want to be in a place where I have excitement and anticipation about how the audience is going to react rather than a heart-pounding, brain wrenching feeling that I may get completely lost at any moment.
I will probably still use my cheat sheets, but I'm hoping that they will be there just for emergencies. I work a little more each day, getting clearer, trying new character choices, deciding where beats need to land.
This is the work. This is the joy. This is the life...LLC!
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